Where the hell are you, man?
Come soon! The match is about to start! We never get entry into the club
because of you, man! Come soon! Yeah, yeah, I’m coming.
Why are you shouting? Listen, have your curd and come. I don’t want to take any risk
this time around. Bro, we’ve got to make our team
win this time. Come soon! Chill, man. They’re anyway going to be playing the
National Anthem, which you won’t get. Why won’t I get it? I’ve been listening
to it since my childhood. Since your childhood? And what’s with this blue you’re wearing? I’ve told you a million times before
that Manchester City is Blue and Machester United is red. This red, man.
They’re 2 different teams, bro! I’m sorry… Hold on a second! Where did this Manchester come in between
India and Pakistan, man? You’re funny, man… Bro, it’s ManU vs Liverpool today. Hey! I’m not kidding! It’s the India vs Pakistan
Champions Trophy final today! At 7:30 P.M. Sandy, even I’m not kidding! It’s the FA Cup Final today.
At 7:30 P. M. Listen…Just listen to me. -Look, Manchester is…
-Which Manchester, man?! We both decided to take our shirts off
and dance every time Dhoni scored a six! Who are you to steal from me? But you can do that even
when Pogba and Lukaku score a goal, right? Who the hell is Pogba and Lukaku? Look at what a tongue twister this is! Listen, you watch your Messi and Ronaldo. I don’t want to waste my time
on this stupid, boring and lame game. Did you just call football lame,
stupid and boring? And useless, disgusting
pointless. I rather go…and have a shower
instead of watching football! Oh, disgusting?! What about the FIFA you play all day on
the playstation? Where’d that come from? I played it? After selling my CAT exam books! I did the right thing then. ‘Cause your future in MBA is as good as
the future of football in India. This FIFA, football and all that jazz
is just good as a video game. Oh yeah! The same video game
even has cricket 2007. The one where no one has ever
completed playing an entire match! Everyone bats for a while, hit sixes
and skips the bowling part. You all are a shame to EA Sports! What’s with your football…? Okay, give me 3 names
of Indian footballers. Here you go! Bhaichung Bhutia, Sunil Chhetry… John Abraham. Dude, players aren’t important! The country’s important! And there is
a future for football in India. Didn’t they qualify
for FIFA under 17? Yeah. They came back
with the same speed they went in. Also, they only qualified
’cause of being the host. This very attitude! It’s because of this
very attitude that the state of football in the country is
like the first slice of bread in a pack. Everyone’s ignoring it! Bro, why would we even eat
the slice if we can’t digest it? Yeah, but it’s very easy
to digest cricket, right? It’s got a 100 rules which y’all keep
updating it every year like it’s android. There’s a 5-day test, then 50-50,
and then 20-20! I wont be surprised if you start tossing
a coin to take the cup home! Look at our football.
It’s been 90 minutes from the start! We got it right in the first time, bro! ‘Match has not begun due to rain.’ Pakistan got lucky! -Pussy game.
-Sorry? Pussy game! The match is stalled
’cause of a little rain? Look at football now, be rain or snow,
the match goes on, right? Bro, it’s not about the rain,
it’s about the player’s fitness. What if they fall sick? A cold or fever or even pneumonia? You’ll fall sick if you
work hard, right? They hardly play a little but still need
a tea, lunch or cigarette break? Take Messi as an example. He runs so much to
celebrate a goal that’s equal to how much Inzamman
would’ve run in his entire career. You please don’t talk about players! You guys compare Messi to Sachin!
To Sachin?! Just ’cause someone is short
doesn’t make him Tendulkar. Get that straight! I don’t think you’ve ever seen
Messi play. Shame! You know what’s more shameful? People like you bringing the football
culture in here! Our cricket’s timing perfectly aligns
with the Indian comman man’s timing. Your Champions League
starts late into the night! At a time which either artists
or owls are awake. See, we are genetically modified to play
and watch cricket. Bro, it’s not the genes.
This is all the work of the Britishers! Indians are in love with 3 things
that the British left behind. English, captain Russel’s challenge
and as a result, cricket. That’s why this is the state of football
in this country. Tell me something,
do you go to the gy,? Now don’t start body-shaming me! My abs are like the winter in GoT,
they’re coming. Clearly! Tell me truth.
Do you go? It’s just been 2 days I joined, man.
And my car’s not been working! That’s exactly why I’m sitting here
with you and missing the match. Look at that, your car is not working. So your car, football and your body
are in the same condition. They’re all not working! Bro, if you’d focused
on fitness like me, and if you’d have put Total Quartz Oil
in your car, then things would’ve been different. Your body needs the same amount of care
and fitness to stay younger for longer, just like my car. And so does football. Wow! You’ve made such an easy comparison! I have no clue about cars! Bro, I’m Naren Choudhary,
not Naren Kartikeyan. And just because I choose to care about
football won’t mean that everybody will. Everyone will have to do it. -But till there’s cricket in this…
-Hold on! It’s the legendary players that have made
cricket legendary not the people here. Even today, when people see a video on
social media of Yuvraj Singh balling 6 sixes, no one skips it,
they watch it completely. No matter who the batsman is, they all adjust like Sachin once
as the walk the crease. Be it International Cricket
or Street Cricket.. Every single person wants to end the match
with a winning 6 like Dhoni. Who are these people? And where do they come from? This is why Cricket in this country was,
is and will always be a legend. Do you guys have water? Uh…Sure!
We always have water! Always… That’s blue. Bleeding blue. Cricket team, India. -Thanks.
-See, blue! Bro, do you watch hockey? Nice game…Nice game. I think we should watch hockey. We should empower hockey. Brilliant game! I mean, it’s got a bat
and ball, also has goal penalty. Amazing, man! Let’s do this, we’ll go home, put on
the television and watch a game. You’re right! The wine’s quite expensive
there and you don’t know your limit! It’s anyway India’s national sport, man. -We have to watch it.
-Oh man! -Hockey is not India’s national sport.
-What is then? Tell me what you’re going to do. I’ll go to the gym. Then? I’ll turn my car around and definitely use
Total Quartz car engine oil. Why? To keep my car’s engine
younger for longer. Listen, I know my part. You tell them what to do. Guys, like and share the video. And tell us in the comments below
what the national sport of India is. Please stay tuned for more episodes
of ‘Bonet Pe Charcha”. And for more fun videos,
subscribe to The Screenpatti. And also subscribe
to Harsh Beniwal’s channel. The link is in the description.

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Dennis Veasley

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