– It’s been called the greatest
rivalry in all of sports. Two of the most legendary
teams in college football, Ohio State and Michigan,
known simply as, The Game. (intense music) Welcome to College Game
Day, I’m Dandy Dip, with me as always is Chuck Puber. Chuck, what can we expect
to see this afternoon? – Dandy, I’ll be honest
with you, I clicked a link last night, and ended up
spending about five hours reading articles on how bad
football is for the body. I tried to get out of doing the show today based on my moral revulsion,
but the producers said I had to come in. – Well we see all that,
but what can we expect to see from the game? That’s what our viewers want to know. – Brutality Dandy, what else? These boys, so, so
young, don’t yet realize the terrible toll this game
will take on their minds, their bodies, and their futures. – Well, that’s a bit of an
overstatement there Chuck– – Is it? – We all– – I don’t think so. – We all acknowledge that
college football is a rough sport, but it’s one
with a proud history– – Says you. – Yeah sure, Ohio State
and Michigan have played each other for over 100 years. – We’ve been doing all
sorts of horrible things for more than 100 years. American history is a
labyrinth of nightmares– – Not a fair parallel– – I wanna show you a piece of footage. This is a clip from the
movie “Concussion”– – Chuck we certainly don’t have the rights to show that at all– – I don’t care! Movie blows this whole thing wide open, did people just not see this? Will Smith was in it! – Hey, let’s move on,
thank you very much Chuck. For a look at the starting
match ups, here’s Mike Bike. Mike, will the Wolverines be able to overcome Dwayne Haskins’
passing game, what do you think? – Dandy, Chuck emailed
me an article about brain injuries of dead football players, and … – Sure did. – I can’t seem to think
about anything else. – We don’t need to, Mike– – Take a look at this. When a football player
makes a headfirst hit, his brain, suspended
in fluid, keeps moving until it makes impact with the skull. Football turns a boy’s
own bones, into weapons. – If we just get back– – Mike I got a question
for you, can you believe how young these boys are? – I know Chuck. – They look like men, but
they’re really just boys. – Heartbreaking. – These athletes chose to
play football, this is a game! They enjoy playing this game,
no one forced them into it. – I believe it was Anatole
France who once said that, “The law and it’s
majestic equality forbids “the rich and poor alike
from sleeping under “bridges, stealing loaves
of bread and begging in “the streets,” his point
there being that choice is part of a social construct. Social pressure can be subtle, but it is in fact, impossibly strong. – God that must have been
one hell of a Wikipedia hole you went down so– – I’m awake and I’m not
going back to sleep. – And is the choice between abject poverty and bodily harm, really any choice at all? – Okay, you know, look at the
coaching strategy for today, let’s go down to the
field, talk to Gina Jeans, Gina, how do things look in the shoe? – Dandy, this is a beautiful stadium, and was recently renovated
to fit 105,000 fans. – God, what a beaut, right? – Think of all the ways
a school, a school! Could’ve used that money. – Gina, did Chuck email you?
– Chuck email me? Yes he did. – Well, we wanna go back
to talking to the coaches– – Absolutely! Ohio State’s coach Urban Meyer is paid over 6 million dollars a year! His opponent today, Jim
Harbaugh, is paid nine million. Picture that the next
time you see students who can’t afford textbooks. Also, Urban knew, he knew the whole time. – Folks, I’m just gonna go ahead and say we need to get this back on track. We’re here to talk about the game. – Gina, in Matthew 19:24,
we are told by Christ that it is easier for
a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of Heaven. Given that, do you think these two coaches are gonna get sucked straight
into Hell when they die? Or is it more likely,
given all the injustice in the world, that there is no God? – We could talk about this
some other time Chuck– – Better question, how
are they handling the fact that those boys are getting
paid what, exactly, Gina? – They don’t see a penny, Chuck. – They make nothing, insanity! – We’ll talk about this on
a very special episode– – The owning class in this country, only profits at the expense
of the working class. – Look, everyone, this is a fun, this is a fun rivalry, right? College football … Okay, yes Chuck, college
football isn’t perfect, right? But it’s a good 100%
all-American tradition. – Absolutely, Dandy. Wealthy people profiting
off the physical misery of mostly minorities, what could be more all-American than that? – Why do you have such a problem staring into the demons that
have plagued this country– – I like it, okay? I like football! It’s mine, and I like
it, and I’m not about to just give it up because … What, what did you, did
you write CTE on my face? What is that? – You bet I did, Dandy. It’s the brain disease that almost every dead football player has. It literally drives them insane. – Okay.
– Horrifying. – No, you know what, I think it’s time, we, we’re gonna go to commercial here. So, we’ll be right back with an evening preview of Penn State. – Penn State, oh, talk about boys–

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Dennis Veasley

100 thoughts on “The Truth About Football”

  1. Although I'm a huge football fan, I have to say most of this video was on point. Especially the part about the athletes not being paid. To me, that's the biggest issue mentioned that has a relatively easy fix.

    I think it was wrong about comparing the cost of the stadium to broke college students. I get it, I myself am a broke college student, but the reason they have so much money for fancy facilities like that is that the sports themselves generate much of that money, especially at elite athletic colleges like Michigan and Ohio State. It's not like the money is being taken away from students. Also, money schools generate from athletics ultimately do help all students who attend.

  2. Brennan will destory all the things you know as true, from seemingly innocent sports to the meaning of life EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS A LIE

  3. Social Construct? No, just stop paying the pro athletes, that these college players are trying to join, tens of millions of dollars per season, and maybe they'll stop

  4. Gotta say, it's still a choice. You're right that there's hardly a choice between poverty and brain damage.. I'd go with poverty

  5. Exactly. At least these are young men, in many sports athletes start dangerous training as very young children, when they don't even have choice between poverty and chance of prosperity, but simply forced by their parents into vigorous training which will consume their life to the point where they don't know how to do anything else…

  6. This makes my head spin. Everyone keeps on bahshing football for concussions and cte but the equipment has improved, Vicis and riddle have made helmets that battle concussions well.

  7. everybody else: alright we use foot to kick a ball so its football obviously
    America: nah lets call it soccer and name football after a sport that uses more hands than feet

  8. Brennan looks like such a goddamn chode, but hes so fucking talented and nice and sweet and unnerves me. Keep on keeping on Brenny.

  9. I've been living in denial since I first saw a sketch of his, but this has made me realize I can no longer pretend that Brennan is not my absolute ideal person. I ❤ him. Very much.

  10. Has nothing to do with the nature of the sport, rugby players have less brain injuries and they don’t wear helmets… the issue is the way we design our helmets. Football would inherently be safer if they didn’t wear helmets at all. Tackling wouldn’t be as aggressive.
    Also, I don’t think anyone in ch staff understands how money works…

  11. Another truth about not-football: people don't care about it outside of the US. But people outside of the US love football!

  12. I think we can all tell who was never good at sports lol most sports with any form of contact cause serious damage. I've played football and rugby for years and had 2 concussions. I'm fine lol everyone on here saying they got a minor concussion once and it effected them horribly for life definitely just got there bell rung on their Freshman or JV football team, didn't like the contact and made up a reason why they couldn't play anymore. Which is fine! Contact sports are not for everyone, and you shouldn't feel embarrassed or bad if you don't like it. The NFL was disgusting for hiding the info they did and college sports is so corrupt its astounding, but those are the organizations behind the sport, not the actual sport itself. At a certain point you lay out all the info and possible consequences and if they want to play than let them play. Sports like football, rugby, hockey and MMA are violent and brutal, but they also breed so many great qualities in young men and women. Not everyone is cut out for finesse sports like basketball or soccer, not everyone has the confidence to do theater or the artist drive to do music! People are just built for different things.

  13. Shit I really love collegehumor but I HAVE to make a correction here. The rich man verse is referring to the kingdom of heaven, which is separate from salvation. All true Christians are saved and will enter the kingdom of God(heaven) but only the few good Christ-following ones will enter the Kingdom of heaven WITHIN heaven, hence why it's difficult for a rich man to enter it and follow Christ(material wealth is a sign of attachment to the indulgences of the world). Works don't save you, but righteousness through following Christ will grant you additional rewards within heaven. Any Christian who doesn't understand/believe this is a Calvinist.

  14. I’m feeling conflicted. I played 7 years of football in grade school and I loved it. I don’t think it had an effect on me in any negative ways. That being said pro players and the effects it has on their brains is horrifying

  15. I feel like we don't talk enough about Trapp's acting chops; not only is he a pro at camp and of overreaction, but also, his mastery of microexpressions is legitimately impressive.
    His slow, increasingly more desperate breakdown in this skit required no suspension of disbelief, at all. Nice going, Trapp! 😀

  16. Dear Americans, please consider rugby: all the fun of a full contact, tackle, running game, but without the weaponized pads and head clashes.

  17. 3:57 Um actually Rugby was made first so American football isn't technically an American tradition because it's just Rugby with armour.

  18. I train horses. I've had more concussions than I can count, and several included prolonged unconsciousness. Then I broke my first lumbar vertebra.

    Three months later I was on a horse again.

    Stupid people do stupid shit. I ain't gonna live to 35.

  19. You cannot argue that the social pressure to play football as a means to earn a living and thus avoid poverty isn't a real choice but also use the gross disparity between the earnings of coaches and players. Those are clearly contradictory points. If the players aren't earning much money, if any at all, then you can't claim that it's social pressure to earn a living that causes them to choose college football. And even if they were being paid, it is still a choice because there are plenty of other ways for people to earn money. College football is not the only path towards earning a living, and I find it difficult to imagine that any of the young men playing it do so because they feel it's their only chance at earning money to buy food and shelter.

    Plenty of the stuff brought up here is absolutely valid criticism of the sport and college management and allocation of funds, but if we're going to treat it as real, genuine criticism being presented behind the mask of comedy then I'm going to point out disingenuous things like this.

  20. The type of people who are actually surprised that football gives players brain damage are the type of people we should execute in the street.

  21. You should also encourage people at a young age while in sports that they are more than just bags of meat, too. I think that we are getting better at combating this stigma that a football player is dumb, but that's another can of worms about the influence on adolescents.

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