[music playing] He’s hilarious. He’s handsome. He’s half of my favorite
celebrity couple. Please welcome Dax
Shepard, everybody. Whoa, woo! [applause] Hey, hey, hey, hey. How are you? Hey, hey, hey, Dax-Dax. Oh, you’re stretching. Yeah, I got to limber up. I’m challenging you to
a game of Paddle Battle. Uh-huh. And no pressure,
but I am undefeated. Ready? Great. OK. I have not played in six years. Let’s do it. Don’t touch me. OK. [applause] [music playing] Thank you, Andrew. [ding] [booing] Oh, I shouldn’t have hit that,
because that was going out. Zero-one. Did you have one of
these growing up? No. You didn’t. We were too poor. Yeah, me too. And I bought one at Costco. They make a beautiful product. And then Kristen moved in. And guess what? [ding] [cheering] One up. It’s gone. I don’t have it anymore. It’s gone? Yeah. Kristen 86’d it. It was in the living room
where now the La-Z-Boy is. Yeah, I would prefer that than–
one-one– than the La-Z-Boy. There’s no reason to have
a La-Z-Boy in the house when you can have
a ping-pong table. [ding] [cheering] [ding] [cheering] 2-2, buckle my shoe. OK. [ding] [ding] [ding] No, 2-4. 3-4. OK. [booing] Reverse the tape. [music playing] [ding] [ding] No. Whoa. [ding] Darn it! Uh-uh. Ooh, same problem every time. No. Oh! [ding] Oh. Almost got you. We’re looking like
Olympians right now. Oh! [ding] [applause] Oh-ho! [roar] 6-11. 6 to 11, all dogs go to heaven. Look at that. [ding] That counts. We’re going to count that? OK. 6-12. Who’s gotten closest
to beating you? Uh– Trick question. [ding] Ah! [booing] Yeah. [ding] Ah! Oh my gosh. What’s the record
of beating someone? Am I getting close? 15-8. I’d like to have some record. No, you’re not even close. [ding] Oh. Ooh. 15-9. Oh-ho! [ding] Live by the sword, die by it. Ooh– [ding] Yes! You know who you do not
want to play this game? 10-17. Bradley Cooper. Don’t ever challenge
him to this game. He’s good at everything. I know. And he’s so gorgeous. He really is. Those eyes. I wonder how– He’ll kill you with
those two eyes. [ding] I wonder how Brad
Pitt would play. He doesn’t have
to play very well. Come back in here. Oh! [ding] 14-18. Come on! Get your head in the game! [booing] Look, they put our
name on the scoreboard. That’s really cute– the
attention to detail here. I noticed. [ding] Aha! [music playing] Game point. Ah! 18! Nope, that’s 17– 17. Your staff, I’m telling you. Talk about having the
judges in your pocket. I’m sure that your
people are counting too. Ugh! [ding] Oh, get 11. [music playing] Oh-oh! Yes! [dinging] Woo-hoo! [music playing] [applause] That’s Paddle Battle. That’s Paddle Battle. And that is Paddle Battle. Oh, I was going to do it faster. And that is Paddle Battle! Not that fast. And that is Paddle Battle. Good. Yeah, really nice. [music playing]

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Dennis Veasley

65 thoughts on “Paddle Battle with Ellen and Dax Shepard”

  1. Too funny! Although, I couldn't help but think how great it would have been if this happened when you had Prince on the show. He was the Purple Ping Pong King. Love you Ellen! Best and most positive on TV today. Smooches!!!

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