I didn’t know that cheaters
like you would be playing too. I came on seeing you. Come on, don’t bug me.
Toss the coin. Has anyone got a coin? Wait. Take this. What’s this?
– It’s a packet. If its heads you win
and if its tails I win. How could you rely on this? How could you toss
with a plastic packet? Look, that’s a stone. If its white I win, if its
black you win. Got it? – Okay. Okay. I won! – It’s white, I won! I won!
– Listen. Let’s toss the phone.
– With the phone? Shall I toss the phone? – Okay.
– One – Hey! What are you doing? Dude,
there’s an app in the phone. Oh! There’s an app in the phone?
– Yes. I know you would cheat.
You have fixed it already. I won’t use it to toss. No. Let’s toss the coin. Give me the money. Do I look like a shopkeeper?
– I don’t have change. I don’t have change.
– Get lost! Five rupee coin
is unlucky for me. Two rupee coin
leads to cheating. A ten rupee coin!
Let’s toss a ten rupee coin. Heads. Heads you win.
If it’s tails I win. Since it’s tails I win.
So, I will bat. – Hey. Don’t take me for a fool! You can’t fool me.
Let’s do it again. Fine, toss it. – Look. If it’s heads I win. If it’s tails you lose. – Okay. Hey! Stop!
What did you just say? If it’s tails I win,
if it’s head you lose. Okay. Toss it again. Don’t catch it in your
hand, let it fall. Not like that. Toss it again. We should toss is thrice. We will decide after that. Let’s toss three sets of three. We will decide after that. Okay? Did you come to play
cricket or coin toss? So, how shall we decide? I have a method that’s fair. The two of us will
throw the bamboo. The who throws it farther… …will win the toss. – Okay.
– I will take the first turn. I have a great idea. Let’s lift Piyush… …and toss him in the air. If he falls flat on
his on his face… …its’ heads. If he doesn’t
then it’s tails.- No! No! Mom, no! – Catch him! Catch him! Catch him! That was a bad idea. Why did you throw him
from the first floor? I thought he would flip. We had to try it thrice but he
fell unconscious before that. How shall we decide now? Jadoo, come here. Let’s measure Jadoo’s. If it’s even I win,
if it’s odd you win. – Okay. But… Hold on! Is zero odd or even? Come on, swear on RCB. We will win. Come on. Move aside!
Don’t stand in my way. I’m the umpire.
– So, why are you standing here? Go there. Don’t waste the time! Jadoo, hold on.
– Just throw the ball. Let me do some shopping.
I don’t have time. What are you doing? I’m using Spoyl app. I have been wearing black and
blue clothes in all my videos. When will I go shopping? Why don’t you beggars
use the Spoyl app too? On every order you get
a 100 per cent cash back. At least you will get
some nice clothes to wear. The black one’s good. It’s done. Hey, batsman! Don’t waste the time. Come on. You Poland! Pollard. Don’t stand here.
Stand further back! Further! Further!
Know your limits. You idiot! Stand there! Stand back. That’s enough. Dude, stand at the square leg. What? – Stand at the square leg. Where? – You idiot!
Come forward a few steps. Okay. You lazy bugger! Come forward. Come forward. Some more. Come forward. Come on. A few more steps. Come on. Come on. Come on. Yeah, very nice. Go, get the water bottle. Get the water bottle! Perfect! That’s it! Everybody
stand where you are! Okay? There’s no way the ball
can go past you all. Very nice! I will let you know when the
ball comes. You can wake up then. Is it coming? – No, lie down.
He won’t throw it. Look, he didn’t. Come on, baby. Come on. Yes! Yes! Come on! Do you want to sit?
– No. Do you want to sit?
– No. It’s okay. Come on, sit down. You think you are a chief guest? Go on! Play the game! Good bowling, baby!
Good bowling! Come on, baby. Come on.
He’s just a kid. He’s a baby.
He’s still a virgin. Come on.
He will knocked out in a moment. Come on. How’s that! How’s that! Out! How’s that! Oh, baby! – Let me play.
– Go make TikTok videos. Go make TikTok videos.
You are not fit to play cricket. Come on! Run! Run! Jadoo, run! Run! Jadoo, run!
– Come on! Run! The ball slipped out his hand.
Run! You useless! Stop, Jadoo! You lazy buggers! Run! Come on! – One more. Yes! Hit it! – Stop! Hey! – Run! They are useless!
– It’s not a joke. I’m telling you, this is
not cricket but a marathon. We have been running a marathon.
– My lungs have bursted. I’m exhausted.
I can’t run anymore, dude. You blind!
The ball’s right there. We can’t do it anymore. Why don’t you just hit
the ball with the stump? Jadoo, you can do it.
– No, dude. No, dude. – Just a few more. Mom! – No, dude! Yes! Very good! Great! Just hit the stump! It’s inside! Move aside! Stop! Stop. Come here. Take this ball
and hit the stump. We are standing outside
the crease and very tired. Hit it, dude. Hit him! I will hit you all.
– No, bro! I will thrash all of you! Catch them! You! Get lost! Jadoo, listen. Since you are new, let
me tell you how it’s done around here. We do it a bit
differently around here. I don’t want fights
to take place. Okay? – Okay.
– The first rule is. If the ball hits the stump… …it’s an out. But that’s how it is anyway.
– Listen to me. Just listen to me quietly. Fights take place.
There was a fight recently. A boy died. I killed him.
So, listen to the rules. Can you see this window?
– Yes, I can. I’m talking about this window.
– Which one? – This one. So, don’t look at the… …window in front of it.
Just look at this window. If the ball hits this window… …and the window
breaks, you get 100 runs. 100 runs? – Yes. – Why? A scoundrel lives here who
keeps looking at my girlfriend. So, if you break this window… …I will give you 100 runs.
– But… That’s how we… …do it around here. Listen to the next rule. If the ball is caught after
it bounces once, it’s an out. One bounce… Okay. If caught after two bounces, you
are considered out for two matches. For two matches!
– If caught after three bounces… …then the one who
caught the ball… …that bowler is
considered out. The bowler is out? What’s going on? That’s how it’s
done around here. Jashu, come here. They have such foolish
rules around here. Try to remember them.
I will forget it. If you hit the ball… …and if the player
catches it like this… …then it’s
considered as an out. Jashan, just write down all these
strange rules else we’ll forget it. Yes, get it down.
– Jashan, write it down. Then don’t accuse me of
cheating, fixing… …and sexting.
I won’t allow that. If the ball is caught like this,
then it’s not considered out. If the ball is caught like this… …then you are banned. Ban?
– That’s how it’s around here. Listen, if you hit the ball… …and the ball… …goes into the generator room… …then you will pay
the electricity bill. But, I… That’s how it’s… …done around here. Listen. If you hit a six
in the morning… …then you will be banned.
– Banned? Why? Birds fly around and I don’t
want the birds to be hit. So, you will be banned.
– But, what… birds… Dude, that’s how… …it’s done around here. You aren’t getting it. – What? In the evening,
only boundary shots are allowed. The ground shot is banned. Why? Do the birds
walk on the ground? No, the ants walk on the ground. The ants walk… What?
– Because people visit here. Do the ants walk because
people visit here? Peopel visit here
and sprinkle sugar. And the ants come to eat sugar. And I don’t want the
ball to hit the ants. What ants… What nonsense! Dude.
– That’s how it’s done around here. Absolutely right! Everyday, at 4:45… …a kid pees beside the
flower pot near the parlor. If the ball hits
the kid’s teeth… …then you… …will get 500 rupees.
– 500! The child’s teeth are wiggly. Okay? – Okay.
– The dentists have given up. So, if we break his teeth, the
child’s mom will pay us 500 rupees. Since nobody’s able to do it. So… – But, this is… That’s how…
– It’s done around here. Exclamation mark. Okay? Believe it or not. This rule is my favorite one. According to this rule,
if Jadoo… …hits the ball
at 45 degree angle… …at a speed of 60 kms per hour… …and if the ball crosses
the time-space portal… …and goes into the black hole… …then Jadoo will
get back the ball. I won’t get the ball back. That’s how…
– It’s done around here! Yes. – I know, that’s how
it’s done around here. – Yes. That’s how it’s done around here.
Write it down. Rule number 1235. This rule is a bit controversial. This rule is a bit controversial. If the wicket keeper’s father… …elopes with the
bowler’s mother… …then the son of this captain… …and his family will
lose all matches… …for the next seven lives. I don’t want to play at all! That’s not a rule! I don’t want to play at all!
– Jadoo. Please somebody
make him understand. That’s how it’s… Hello, guys.
If you like this video… …please like, comment and… …and share this video. And don’t forget to
subscribe this channel. Because that’s how
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