(heavy metal music) Leave it to Australia to come up with their own version of football. For a natural athlete like me, mastering this sport would be child’s play. Meet Nick Davis, he’s the assistant manager of the Sydney Swans. I’m here to understand the art of what you call footy. It’s football, but it’s different than football. How is yours different? [Nick] It’s a round field. So, there’s no offense and defense. [Conan] No offense or defense? [Nick] No offense, no defense. No helmets. [Conan] No helmets? [Nick] No helmets. No pads. [Conan] No pads? [Nick] No pads. [Conan] How do you know when you’ve scored a touchdown if it’s round? It’s like a field goal. Kick the ball between the goals. Okay. I should point out, we’re underneath the, (plane engine roaring) you practice at the airport. At the airport. It’s good for the communication. Right. (plane engine drowns out speech) There’s a lot of, really, positives of being at the airport though, mate. You know what’s great? I didn’t hear any of that. That’s alright. Neither do the players, too.
I didn’t hear a single word. I’ve played quite a bit of football in my day. It looks like it. I find that a bit sarcastic, but I’m gonna take it. Alright.
That’s fine. The other thing in AFL is, there’s no sleeves on our jersey. So, it’s really important, if you’re gonna be an AFL player… Okay. That you work you this area a lot. Okay, what do you think? How do I look right now? I said you need to work this area. You think I need to work this area? A little bit. We got you these bright yellow Nikes, so it will give you the illusion of speed. Even if the speed’s not there, you’re gonna look fast. Yeah, you’re gonna look, you’re gonna have all the gear. You’re a rude person, Nick. You’re a rude person. I deal in facts. (heavy metal music) So, Nick, what do you think? The boots look good. This is a sponsor, too? QBE, yep. You’re probably also sponsored by Dr. Seuss. Dr. Seuss. Yeah. Looking good. This is it. I feel like I’m going off to prom and you’re my dad. I’m taking you to meet the guys. Stretching out. Stretching out! It’s quite simple for a master like yourself. It just comes back. And…yeah, okay. So, holding it, and like, nice and straight, kick it. Do we just kick it like that? Who’s laughing? (laughter from Nick) Who’s laughing? This is a circle of trust! We support each other as a team! That’s what the Swans are all about! So I want you to jump down to that second black line. Turn around and I’ll kick it to you. Faster! (marching band music) [Nick] Yeah, that’s alright. In a game I think someone would’ve got you by now. Alright. There’s one more thing. You need to be able to take a specky. What’s take a specky? [Nick] Catching the ball while standing on someone else. There’s no laughing! We’re a team! Who’s the teammate who runs around in the orange thing, dressed like a jar of mustard? Who’s that? Oh, no, this is just a training aid. Oh, this is just for training? You don’t wear this during the game? No, no helmets ever. Well how would I get up on his back if I didn’t have the orange thing? Athleticism. Ability. Desire. Okay. Close! We’ll keep trying ’til we get it! (marching band music) (Conan grunting) We need to get you physically ready to play. So, there’s no helmet. Right. No pads. No pads. Who’s gonna take me down? This guy here? [Nick] Yep. Step forward! Jesus, Lewis. When did they thaw you out? This is incredible. So let’s, should we just do a practice one with Lewis? Here we go. (Conan grunting) It’s yours. Back down the line. (Conan grunting) Put him down, Lewis. (Conan yells) Okay, now I’m gonna need your strongest kicker. [Nick] Will! [Conan] Could you come over here, Will? [Nick] We need you, man. Will, this is important. This is a ball I’ve had specially made. It’s got Jordan Schlansky on it on both sides. He’s one of the most hated people in North America and around the world. It’s important you really hate this guy as much as I do. Can you say you hate him? I hate you. You don’t do anything at the show. You don’t do anything at the show. You just make yourself expensive coffees. You make yourself expensive coffees. You act like you know everything about Italy but you don’t. You act like you know everything about Italy but you don’t. Alright, kick his head into the next century. (laughter from Conan) Thank you! Alright, thank you so much, guys. You taught me that this is not the sport for me. Maybe no sport is the sport for me. (plane engine roaring) And now comes an airplane. (bleep) you!

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Dennis Veasley

100 thoughts on “Conan Plays Australian Rules Football With The Sydney Swans – CONAN on TBS”

  1. There is no one like Conan. Literally in my opinion there hasn't been anyone like him. I am glad he had the tonight show experience because if that had worked out he wouldn't have really become something completely fresh.

  2. Lmao he can literally be like Willy wonka crossed w/ the candy man 🍭 sometimes. The way he uses his body towards his comedy is hilarious! love ya Cone-dog

  3. "leave it to Australia to come up with their own version of football"

    Ummm…. Aussie rules is the oldest version of football. The original? It predates soccer and rugby. I'm shocked he didn't mention that.

  4. Oh wow is appearance a qualification aside from athleticism? I literally had to rewind to take a second look at all the players.

  5. Conan is the kind of man who is going to die on his deathbed with no regrets knowing he has lived life to he fullest. At least that's what I want for him.

  6. Aussie rules was forst drafted in 1858, the earliest game of american footy was played 11 years later. Vfl was founded in 1896, nfl was founded in 1920.

  7. Love you, Conan! I just moved to Melbourne and after this, am dyin' to see some of those legs! Theirs, not yours LOL! Thanks for making me laugh since 93!!!

  8. Not to be THAT girl or anything but I always personally found swimmers bodies extremely beautiful. These lads though? Yeah…these lads though 😂

  9. He's selling himself short when he says footy isn't the sport for him. Given that he'd never played before, he did really well. He took a mark from a speccy and that's not easy to do even when they're wearing that training aid. I think if he'd grown up here he would have been a good footballer.

  10. "Leave it to Australia to come up with there own version of football."
    American football was invented in 1869 while Australian football was invented in 1858. Ahem, ok.

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