Hey man, Have you ever noticed that we wear the exact same clothes Every day? We don’t… We don’t wear any clothes What if we’re both just a cartoon character, and that’s why our clothing’s the same? That’s impossible. Cartoon characters’ mouth’s move We just open our mouths and words start coming out. *GASPS* Hey guys, did you see my brand new Rolex? Heh heh! He-he Are ya jealous? Doesn’t your phone tell the time? Maybe he never noticed that his phone has a clock in it phffft No one buys a Rolex to tell the time I can’t even read this! People buy Rolexes to indirectly tell everyone how much money we can throw away on useless objects. James: Hey, look at what my watch can do Ring ring. Hello? You’ll never believe what Brian just bought. What’d he buy? A WATCH! REALLY?! Phffft What a nerd. Ohh, Brian. I’m the kind of person who doesn’t really care about my outward appearance. A lot of times in high school, we talked about having a healthy self image of ourselves, and teachers would say stuff like… Don’t listen to the people who call you ugly… You’re beautiful. And all I can think was… There’s people saying I’m ugly? For the most part, I haven’t really tried to even learn anything about fashion. Most of the time when I get dressed in the morning, I wear just whatever’s the cleanest. Like… I don’t even know my pants size because
Like… I don’t even know my pants size because I wear basketball shorts all the time. I think… I’m a medium. My parents taught me the value of hard work by making me pay for ALL my clothes. And I am 100% on board with that parenting technique. I think even the super, SUPER rich parents should still make their kids buy their own clothes… …because if you just buy your child anything they want, then they’re gonna turn into A-holes who just expect everything without having to work hard. Those are the types of kids who grow up to flex all their money on people, and who leave their basketball cards all over the cramped dorm. And also, buying your own clothes makes you think harder about what you’re going to spend your precious dollars on. You don’t wanna waste your money, so you have to pick clothes you REALLY like. Except my mom told me I couldn’t buy anything with skulls on them. She said they were… She said they were… “TOO EDGY” And you know what? Fair enough, mom. Looking back, I’m glad I skipped that emo edgy phase. But why didn’t you let me express my true self, mom?! Thank you for not letting me do that. In the 7th grade, I went through an… “I-Need-To-Look-Cool” phase. And one time, I saved up quite a bit of money, so me and my mom went on a shopping spree at Cole’s. #NotSponsored I was gonna impress everyone! I was gonna look so cool with my brand new two pairs of jeans! “I’ll get this normal blue pair, and then the same exact paiir just in case I spill ketchup on the first pair!” That’s another reason why I’m pro “Have-Your-Kids-Pay-For-Their-Own-Clothes”. So that way, they learn how expensive clothes shopping IS! Seriously, two pairs of jeans was 70 DOLLARS!!! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY POKEMON CARDS I COULD HAVE BOUGHT?!!! PROBABLY ENOUGH TO MAKE MY OWN PAIR OF POKEPANTS!!! And that’s when I learned about the magical land… …of Goodwill. At Goodwill, you could buy mediocre, questionably stained looking jeans for a fourth of the price of Cole’s. And since I had to buy all of my clothes, and I was unemployed, I was at Goodwill every other Saturday for that half-off deal. You’re at Goodwill, AND everything’s half-off! That’s like a DOUBLE SALE people! Here’s the thing. Typically, clothes stores have a certain style they specialize in. Tilly’s, you know you’re gonna get that hip, L.A. style clothes. At Old Navy, you know you’re gonna get that “White Boy, White Boy, Ohio” look. At H&M, you know you’re gonna get… …demonetized. But when you step inside your local GoodWill, you don’t know what you’re getting! You get every style of clothing, all in one place! I got my favorite T-Shirt from GoodWill! I even wore it to this panel at VidCon! (low mic volume)
You know, the panel where I didn’t even talk into the microphone, so you couldn’t hear half the words I said. AUGH!!! BUT JAMES, I DON’T WANNA WEAR CLOTHES THAT HAVE ALREADY BEEN WORN BY OTHER PEOPLE!!! THEY’RE GROSS!!! RGGH…COOTIES, AND HERPES… RGGH! Yeah, yeah, that’s true, that’s true. You don’t know who else has worn your clothing. But then again, you could be wearing something that was also worn by… …TheOdd1sOut. Yeah, that’s right! I donate my clothes to GoodWill! Reduce, Reuse, Recycle baby!! Why would someone make a pair of pants out of Pokemon cards? And give it AWAY??!!! I’m not saying “Don’t buy expensive clothing.” Buy whatever you wanna buy. Buy whatever you wanna buy. And…can afford. If there’s two shirts, one is 40 dollars and one is 5 dollars, and you really, REALLY like the 40 dollar shirt, and hate the 5 dollar one, you should get the 40 dollar shirt because you’ll end up wearing it more often! So you get more use out of it. In economics, there’s a term used to measure how much happiness a product will give you. And it’s called “Utils” Sometimes, buying more expensive things will give you more utils of happiness, so it’s worth it to buy expensive clothing. BUT, for me, I get way more utils buying a shirt that is for 5 dollars. You can not put a price on all the oodles and oodles of utils I get for wearing a shirt I like for 5 dollars! You could wear your Supremees, and your Abercrombos, or whatever all you want, I just don’t think it makes a lot of sense spending that much money on a white t-shirt with an ironed on logo. There’s no material in that shirt that makes it as expensive as it is. Oh, nevermind. What you’re really doing is paying for the name brand. So you might as well staple two 20 dollar bills to your shirt, and write in sharpie, “Look everyone, I got 40 dollars!” But again, if you like the design of a white shirt in a red rectangle, then you be happy wearing it. I’m not telling you what to wear. But I will tell you this. Don’t judge someone based on their clothing. That’s like the most shallow thing a person can do. Even if someone is wearing old “hand-me-downs”, or a really expensive name brand t-shirt, don’t treat people differently because of their clothing. There’s a certain YouTuber going around, I’m not gonna say any names… …but I will draw pictures, who’s teaching kids that their value as a person is correlated to the amount of money they spend on clothing. Don’t do that. Okay, “Real Talk” over now. SCHOOL UNIFORMS!!!! People who support school uniforms say that uniforms are better because then the students don’t have to think about what they’re gonna wear the next day, because everyone has to wear the same outfit, but like… I already don’t think about what I’m wearing. That’s probably why I’m naked right now. Okay, that’s not entirely true. I’m not just gonna walk outside wearing a… I don’t know, a pink poncho. I have standards! I just buy all the cheap clothing I think looks nice. In high school, I mostly wore solid color V-neck t-shirts, and one time, a kid on the very last day of school told me… A kid: James, you always wear solid color V-neck t-shirts! You’re like a cartoon character! That’s what I’m GOING FOR. I’ve ALWAYS WANTED to BE a cartoon! High School James: I don’t think you realize how much I LOVE CARTOONS! One time, I bought those shoes with the really fat tongues. I thought they looked cool, but they certainly didn’t FEEL cool! They didn’t have ANY support for my sole! I couldn’t go running in them, so what was even the POINT?!?! And apparently, you’re not supposed to tie the laces of those shoes. I’m not sure. Someone just told me… Emo kid: Hey man, you know you’re not supposed to tie the laces of those shoes, right? Cool James: So I had to bury the laces inside my shoe, and I was constantly stepping on the sharp AGLETS!!!!! *elevator music* And all the cool kids saw my shoes and said… Hey James! Those are some pretty fat tongues you got there! Do you wanna come and sit at our lunch table? And I said: NO, BEING COOL SUCKS! So now, I wear tennis shoes everywhere. Some of you watching are in 7th or 8th grade right now, and you might be going through your own “I-Need-To-Look-Cool” phase. And I just wanna say to you little youngins, you don’t need to impress or prove yourself to anyone. Wear whatever makes you happy… And that…you can afford. And you’d still have to follow the school’s dress code, which is a whole other can of worms. I’m not encouraging anyone to break the rules, okay? All I’m saying is, at the end of the day, what really matters is that… …you’re in 7th grade. Nothing you do will make you cool. I-I’m sorry, everyone regrets 7th grade, okay? Just start putting on deodorant, do the homework, you’ll get through this! Aww man! What a neat video that I made! Sorry it’s been awhile since I’ve done an end card. I’ve been traveling… and speed running. The moral of this video is that you shouldn’t judge people based on their clothing. And you should make your kids pay for their own clothes. That’s, uh…that’s a really good parenting technique. I think my parents were very smart doing that, especially since they had five kids. How do you pay for the clothes of five children, and give them all an allowance? The answer is, you don’t. So I just wanted to reiterate the real moral of this video, and that is don’t judge someone based on their clothing. And that goes for both sides. Like, don’t think someone is automatically really cool for wearing super nice clothes, and don’t think someone is lame for wearing, like, old “hand-me-downs.” Thanks again to the wonderful people who colored the pictures in this video. Everyone, check them out. Link in the description. Now, I can’t make a whole video talking about clothes without plugging my MERCH STORE!!! All this talk about t-shirts have made me realize I should probably update my merch store. And as of recording this, I have NOT made any new designs yet. But if I make some before this video comes out, then, WOW!!! Look at those! So be sure to check out the merch store cause I’m gonna be adding designs…at some point. And remember, that no matter what you wear, you should always wear your seatbelt.