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Dennis Veasley

100 thoughts on “Being The Non-Drinker In The Room with Jamie & Shaaba! // Vlogmas 2019 Day 4”

  1. I used to drink with friends but due to having a chronic illness I rarely go out so don't drink very often now (plus my girlfriend doesn't drink). I am curious I'd Jessica would come out as drunk on a breathalyser due to her medication (I know she doesn't drive but would be important to know if she ever did).

  2. I don't drink alot, it's easy as I've got drunk on just two or three but I didn't like getting too out of control. I've known people who got so drunk they injure themselves which is worrying. My doctor keeps asking how much I drink (about one glass a week if you spread it to average over a year) as I have some signs of liver damage. My family drink and think it's funny as I'm a total lightweight when it comes to alcohol.

  3. I have one liver and it's not doing too well so no booze here. I find it stressful, as an autistic person, to be around drunk people because they lose their social filters and get a lot meaner.

  4. This was absolutely wonderful 💗 I have spent 5 years on medication that doesn't mix well with alcohol, and have only recently been able to have more than 1 standard drink at a time. There were times I felt left out, but it definitely did have some positive outcomes – I find that once people get drunk, they don't pay much attention to their food, so I often get multiple servings of dessert 😂

  5. i drink kinda socially? like if im at a family reunion or a friends house and they have something that sounds tasty ill have a few but thats it. also re the alcohol at pride, so my understanding is a lot of prides most notably big ones are very involved with companies for funding and stuff, and because of the discrimination and abuse we face we're a vulnerable group of people to things like alcohol. and companies like smirnoff 100% pray on us. they absolutely target us

  6. I dont really drink at all. People know that if I go for a single dark and stormy that things aren't going too good and will offer help. I surround myself with people who understand. Some of whom are tea total. Either way it's good.

  7. I HATE drinking because I feel like I'm no longer in control of myself, even if I have 1 glass of wine with dinner. The only times I've been DRUNK have been Irish family weddings, and thats because I feel comfortable with them.

    I hate when people try and force me to drink because I feel like I need to have at least one for them to be happy. but I hate it.

  8. I’m not a non drinker but I’m also not a drinker if that makes any sense whatsoever lol I hardly ever drink because I don’t like drinking alone and I’m alone 90% of the time. I live alone and I don’t have any friends so I don’t go out. I’ve had a premixed Canadian club whisky in my fridge for maybe 2 years it’s probably no good now, I’ve also got apple cider I’ve had for 5 years which is definitely no good (don’t ask why I still have them because I have no clue). I have maybe 3-5L of straight spirits in my pantry. I don’t drink while out because I have to drive home. If I do drink it’s usually only 1 or 2 I hate being really drunk

  9. I have never drank alcohol and never will and I get a lot of people saying go on try it. Thanks to migraines I have a heightened sense of smell so wine smells like vinegar to me and beer just smells foul.
    I live in the town that gave the world Johnny Walkers whisky and when it was being made here I couldn't walk past the bottling plant as I would get an instant massive migraine

  10. I can't drink because of my medication and I'm always amazed at the way people react when I tell them. They genuinely seem to pity the fact that I can't 'enjoy' drinking alcohol and I'm like 'dude, that shit smells nasty af, why would anyone want to drink that?' Not to mention is twice as expensive as anything else you could drink or eat.

  11. I used to be tea-total until university (the stress drove me to drink) so I understand the pressure of being the one who doesnt drink and will respect that when I meet someone who doesnt. Thankfully my unis LGBT society had a mix of events involving alcohol and ones that didnt (games nights, afternoon tea, going to a board game cafe, movie nights, etc). I think the fact there are barely any non-alcoholic events at LGBT societies gives the community a bad image

  12. I am unable to drink because of my medication. When I did drink, it was on a rare occasion and could not drink any-more than 2 glasses of red wine. I am okay with real ale.

  13. When I was in Uni I was the grad rep for the LGBT society and I quickly realised that all the events were centered around alcohol and part of being grad rep is also being a rep for older students, some of whom have children, so I really stressed to organise events that were not alcohol-based and that would be suitable for children, and generally less big party stuff. But I agree that LGBT stuff tends to be associated with party-heavy stuff and that's a bit of a problem.

  14. I love this! Im a student who lives in Scotland (aka land of the alcoholics) and whenever I say to people that I don't drink they look at me like i'm crazy! (I have lots of reasons for not drinking, but it mostly comes down to anxiety, and some pretty rampant emetophobia) but im always asked "why???" and made to explain myself because it's so uncommon for someone not to drink up here. It actively offends my family, who are VERY Scottish and will take any excuse they can to crack open a bottle. I'm always the only one at a party still sober at the end of the night, but my philosophy is that if i'm not there to carry my friends drunk asses home, then who will? This video is so important, and I absolutely loved hearing your experiences. I recently found your videos and have become completely obsessed with you guys! (fellow lesbian here) Jessica has really inspired me to try and find a bit more confidence in myself, and to live life unapologetically. Your videos make me feel like im not so alone, thank you. <3

  15. Casual alcoholism honestly terrifies me, it always made me so uncomfortable that any and every thing the people I was in highschool with did involved drinking in some shape or form. And being the non-drinker ususally ment I wasn´t invited or I got made fun of (or constantly had drinks shoved in my face, because the goal was to get the non-drinking kid drunk).

  16. As a university fresher I’m currently on my 10th night out in a row. I got home at 8am this morning, showered, and then went out to my 9am lecture. 😅

  17. My daughter doesn't drink – she never fancied it and hated the way it made people around her behave. One time she was asked on a conference and they separated the drinking and non-drinking dinner tables. She realised she was the only non-Muslim at her table.

  18. I've neve been a heavy drinker but now I don't drink because of my meds. I've never drunk alcohol to get drunk, except for once, and I regretted it deeply. For me it's about the taste. So now, what I do, ocasionally, if there's something I would like to try, I take a sip so I can taste it, but that's it. But it has to be something very special, interesting to try in terms of flavour. Otherwise I can live without it. What I miss, besides the options, because non-alcoholic options are quite limited, it's the paraphernalia. For example, if I order a gin-tonic, I going to get a fancy balloon glass, with things like red fruits, cucumber or cardamom, and the bartender pours the tonic using one those spoons to "break the bubble" whatever that means. But if I just order the tonic, I get a plain glass and a sad slice of lemon, sometimes I don't even get ice and I have to pour the tonic myself. Totally different experience. It's like flying in first class or in coach.

  19. I don't drink, never had, hate the taste. I also have been not invited to things because I don't drink, I've been called boring and a lot of friends (used to) had the desire to make me drunk. Also a lot of people think it is for religious purposes? I don't understand why it is so hard to get that some people just don't like alcohol :c

  20. Mocktails are not enough of a thing (atleast here in the US) so drink options always suck, and everything always is about going drinking. I've noticed drinkers seem… Judged? Because I don't drink and feel comfortable drilling me on why I drink. Often right off the bat. I don't do that to them! Oi. Ah well, I've found my circle of people where alcohol isn't so important.

  21. My friends sometimes drink, some more than others, but I just don't enjoy going to bars. They're loud and bright and expensive, so I would rather get dinner and some wine with my friends. My medication also does this strange thing where I'll be completely fine and sober for the first 3 or 4 drinks and then, at some unknown point after that, all of the alcohol will hit in a single wave and then I'm just smashed. So I avoid that. XD

  22. I do drink and the culture in America is much like what you described England being like. I actually work at a wine bar & bistro and my boss/the co-owner is a certified sommelier, so while I do party and drink on occasional weekends (holidays, birthdays usually), my shift drink that I'm allowed is usually a glass of wine. I'm trying to increase the sensitivity and what-have-you of my palate so I can actually pick up on all those notes they say you should be able to taste. 😅 That said, I understand not wanting to drink and I certainly don't think it's a necessary part of a party or gathering. I do prefer if large parties or gatherings where I don't know most anyone have alcohol though – but like Claudia said that's mostly just so I'm less nervous and anxious and can be more myself & relax.

  23. yessss! I honestly have tried to drink, but alcohol makes me feel ill and makes my face hot. There's only one drink I actually like, not just 'oh I'll drink because its new years' or whatever. Seagrams wine coolers in the watermelon/strawberry flavour are the only drinks i can't taste the alcohol in. plus i think its pretty low alcohol content, so its safe for me to drink them on all my meds

  24. In Denmark you are allowed to drink when your 16 (not the strongest drinks though) and its common to start when your about 14-15. The alcohol culture here is really bad

  25. I don't drink much, I can go 6 months without any then have half a glass of wine or a cocktail, I have never been drunk and dislike the feeling of dizziness and disorientation. My family are quite confused as their celebrations all centre around alcohol.

  26. I'm 16 and from Germany. In Germany if you are 16 you are allowed to drink and buy beer and wine and it is common at family gatherings to give everyone who is not like a child alcohol (often it's just one glass of Sekt), so people are quite surprised that I've never drank alcohol before. For example last year on Carnevale we were at a party and I was the only one who didn't drink, all my friends and classmates at least drank one glass of beer.

  27. I used to drink, but i dont anymore because i got meds for my heart and im allowed to have like 1 beer and i dislike beer. I do however smoke weed, which is legal where i live, i do it for partying and for medical reasons, diffrent kinds for either reason ofcourse. i view weed the way most people view alcohol like 1 in the weekend ir something. My boyfriend however can drink like a pirate, he has calmed down since we started dating but it still takes him more than a bottle of wiskey to get drunk.

  28. Due to how news stations would present murder stories as a kid(probably do it the same way now) as the murderer being drunk and murdering both his parents, combined with the amount of media showcasing what happens when you're an alcoholic, personal experiences with alcohol(having a mother who was an alcoholic, who also died from deliberately mixing alcohol and countless pills of sleeping medication), seeing how obsessed people were in high school(sister would sneak it to school and also steal it from our legal guardians)and the fact I can't drink too much without it risking some sort of bad combination with the medications I am taking- I don't really partake in alcohol, other than to sip it.

    But in my culture there is a lot of emphasis on alcohol. There are always parties for younger people, and my sister and other students had problems with mixing it and school for some reason? When my sister was more or less my legal guardian for a brief period, our oldest sister had to make her stop going out at night for the parties she was doing because it heavily impacted her daily mood. I don't really go to bars or to parties, since I'm more of an internet person than an irl person, so I wouldn't know about the party culture other than what I assume and from what my sister tells me. But as far as I can tell, a good portion of adult gatherings in Southern US does involve alcohol to an extent.

    On my 21st birthday I drank maybe a can of some sort of cherry flavored alcohol, had a headache even though I thought I was drinking enough water, and that is my only experience with drinking more than a few sips of alcohol.

    I love Jamie and Shaaba! I'll have to check them out.

  29. As a non-drinker, I do believe it is time for me to find the trans events in my community, just so I can have some non-alcohol based events to go to! I’m a lawyer, and I don’t know how it is in England, but in the US, every legal event revolves around alcohol. Yes, it can be entertaining to be the only sober one in a room, but that mostly goes for being with a group of friends who say hilarious things that you can tease them about forever. Being the only sober one in a room full of professional contacts is very, very dull.

    I don’t drink because 2 attempts before I was of legal drinking age both ended with violent vomiting minutes after starting to sip the drink. I asked a doctor who told me it is a genetic inability to digest alcohol due to an extra enzyme or a missing one (I’m 62 and I’ve never been able to remember which!) In all the years since, I’ve twice been handed a drink I didn’t realize was alcoholic and both ended abruptly the same way as my earlier attempts.

    I used to just say “I don’t drink” but that led to a lot of people quizzing me on why I didn’t drink. Then the concept of designated driver was developed, and for awhile, I could just say that I was the DD for the evening and that would do it. Then people went back to challenging me. So I’ve changed my approach to a more brutal one – I say “I am genetically incapable of digesting alcohol. If you give me a drink I don’t realize is spiked, I will give it back in under 5 minutes, possibly on your shoes.” That usually stops the conversation entirely but it also stops people trying to sneak alcohol into something I’m drinking.

    I also hate all soft drinks so I’m usually drinking straight water. Like Jessica, I need to drink pretty steadily throughout the day, and often through the night too. I don’t drink 8 liters though; probably 3 or 4 on an average day. And I can tell you that people with chronic dry mouth, whether due to genetics or medication side effects, can expect to pay way more in dental expenses than other people. I just try not to think about it!

    And just a hint about groups involving parents – parents of young children often drink as a coping mechanism. One of the two spiked drinks I was unknowingly given was at the day care for all 3 of our young kids – it was a parent & child evening holiday potluck and was the last place I expected alcohol to be served. When I pointed that out to the staff later on, they said that given the choice between an evening at home with alcohol or an evening party with other parents without alcohol, people uniformly chose the former.

    My family drink with my parents drinking far more than any of their kids ever have. One sister doesn’t like the taste or the risk of losing control, and the other drinks in extremely limited situations and never very much. My parents had “drink time” when my dad got home from work and wine with dinner became more and more of a thing as time went by. My genetic inability to handle alcohol is spontaneous, and while it can be inherited, my 3 kids don’t seem to have got it. One enjoys wine, one is strongly affected by even a little wine and has never tried anything stronger, and one just hates the taste of everything tried to date.

    The genetic oddity shows up around the world, but is most common in Japan (in terms of distribution as an absolute percentage of population.) It is considered a major affliction for men because business dinners involve a lot of alcohol. In the US, many people agree with my husband when he says “the moment I found out she couldn’t drink was the moment I decided to marry her” So the idea of a permanently sober driver is appealing, apparently!

    I really found this episode unexpectedly informative because I had no idea that Pride events were so alcohol driven, and I’m really interested that trans events tend not to have it be such a central part of events.

  30. Norway has a really awfull drinking culture too. Everyone getting super drunk at parties is kinda the norm, especially among young people (18 is the legal drinking age, but a lot of people in my home town started drinking at 15). I've never tried alcohol, simply because I never felt like drinking. Kinda sucks to be the only none drinker, expecially since I'm quite introverted and not good at small talk lol.

    Luckily, I now have a couple of good friends who also don't drink. One of them being like me (never tried), and the other one stopped drinking recently, because she felt a lot better without alcohol. I don't see them super often, but we met last weekend and went out to a restaurant eating pizza, and it was super nice!

  31. Alcohol has been the only painkiller that consistently works.
    Most of the time I just try to limit the pain but honestly if someone is asking me to socialize after a long day on my feet alcohol really helps.

  32. I loved Jamie's channel but he insists on using auto captions but mumbling and whispering in almost all his videos. I tried to keep watching but unfortunately it was just inaccessible to me.

  33. I really enjoyed the video! I very very rarely drink alcohol, normally I am the designated driver so that tends to work for me because people want me to stay sober!

  34. I'm not a big drinker at all. I used to not drink at all, but now I might have a glass of something occasionally. But never beer because it is so gross! Drinking has never been a big thing in my immediate family, so I think it was just natural for me to not. I also don't like the taste of most alcohol and am way too much of a control freak to want my inhibitions lowered.

  35. I also don’t drink, it’s also something that a TON of people in the US think is very odd. I literally told someone five times I don’t drink as they were asking me what wine I preferred. I told them I don’t drink and even when I did I’ve always disliked wine. “oh, you’ll like this one!” Shoves cup into hand. Luckily it was dark out so as they were drunkenly babbling at me I was able to subtly pour the wine out. 😩 So annoying when people don’t respect your decisions- especially something that can lead to an addiction as it has done with so many people. 🙄 Lovely video, so nice to see likeminded people.💗

  36. OK! Now I know there is a term for what I am! I don't like drinking at all, but I totally understand Jamie watching all the other drunk people and their hilarity!!! 🙂

  37. Ahhhhh!! It’s like my two favorite channels and all my favorite people hanging out in one placeeeee. ❤️❤️❤️

  38. loved it! very fun! ive always been a weirdo party animal hyperactive sort of person and during youth it kinda sucked because people were so fixated on being 'cool' that i ended up only having fun by myself, so even though i dont drink i like drunk parties better because i do indeed ft in with all the other people losing themselves to do whatever, i usually accept the first drink and just sp at it very very veeery slowly so that then i can find a drunk person and give them the rest of it like i got it for them XD when i do actually drink i end up fighting people :/ so that just added to the dislike i already had for the taste and the consequences ^~^'' i wish i were a more collected person so that i could at least pull the designated driver card and not just negotiating my way out of shots or chugging

  39. My biggest annoyance about not drinking is the lack of respect from others when you say you don’t drink and don’t really have a reason beyond “I don’t want to”/“I don’t like it”. If offered a drink, after some persistence, they eventually try for a soft drink instead but I only drink water really, which is free, and I have to ask for no lemon so I’d sooner do it myself. I just don’t want or need other people to get me any kind of drink, ever, but they always feel obliged and like I’m the one in the wrong for refusing.

  40. I drink but I'm also the only one of my friends with a driver's license and a car (no transit available), so I'm automatically the designated driver!

  41. I'm always happy to see people talking about not drinking. I don't know how it compares to England, but being a non-drinker in North America feels similarly alienating, so I really appreciate seeing a conversation with three other non-drinkers (and one Claudia, because she's always good in a video). I drank a bit when I turned 19 (the legal age in Canada), but by the time I was 20 I stopped pretty much permanently. I tell people it's because when I was drinking, I got drunk one time and didn't dismiss the idea of driving while impaired outright, and I don't trust myself when I've shown my judgement can get so impaired (if anyone is worrying, I didn't actually drive – I just considered it and another friend outright forbid it, something for which I am eternally grateful). While that is technically true, the fact is that for years I was worried that if I drank, I'd come out as trans while I was drunk before I was ready, so I didn't let myself drink out of fear of that. I've since come out and am living my life the way I'm most comfortable, but the not drinking has stuck, and I'm pretty content to live a life where I don't get drunk.

    This has been storytime with a random person in the YouTube comments!

  42. I get cluster headaches between Oct and March and cannot drink (though otherwise I am a one-a-week drinker). One of the few reliably identifiable triggers of cluster headaches is alcohol, and unfortunately my cluster period falls in prime drinking/party time. I live in Idaho in a very productive wine region and work in a large hospitality business, so it seems every holiday party and every outing is at a winery, a brewery, a tasting room, or an event location that heavily features local alcoholic beverages. If you don’t participate, you’re “not supporting the local economy.” (eyeroll) It can feel rather exclusionary.

    As an introvert, someone who is probably already feeling bad from the medication side effects, and who additionally feels seasonal effects of bipolar 2 (not to mention I don’t celebrate Christmas!), I’m pretty much just avoiding holiday parties or skipping out early. Otherwise I just grab a hot cocoa and gab with the rest until the party gets too rowdy, then I’m on my way. I’m glad for my introversion and general overfrugality in this case only so I don’t feel like I’m missing out on too much “fun stuff.” 😛

  43. I'm Colombian and Alcohol is a big thing in both my families!

    (Rant bellow because I didn't pay attention to how much I wrote)

    In my mom's side, my great-grandfather would give each grandchild a bottle of beer in parties that lasted them through the night, and in my dad's side rum is A Really Big Thing, but my great-grandmother loved aguardiente with sprite, and even joked about sprite (as in the soda) being the thing that made you drunk.

    My parents have always given me small doses of alcohol to the point it's normalised and easily available, so I don't feel the necessity my fellow peers (I'm a teenager/young adult) have with getting completely wasted. I do enjoy a sip of it from time to time at family gatherings or events, but I could live without it.

    Idk alcohol is weird and to each their own

  44. I very very very rarely drink, my boyfriend doesn't either. We are the odd balls to our friends and family! It's great. We is usually on babysitting duty! But yayyy babies

  45. The amount of drinking/drinkers varies in my friend group but for Halloween we now do a non drinking party at my house because we all love doing elaborate costumes and were tired of going 'into town' where it felt like the only option was to be amongst the drinking and all the loudness/mess/inconvenience that involves when really all we wanted to do was sit around and show off our costumes to each other

  46. Yesss, as a student who does not drink it can be so frustrating socially…in Canada (my home country) its not too bad (ppl more alarmed that I don't drink coffee than the no alcohol thing) but since being abroad in Netherlands I haven't been able to go to or enjoy any student events because all late at night and all drinking oriented :/
    Also, so happy to see these four beautiful rays of sunshine all at once!! Love you guys.

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